The Blogspot of Beth Grosshans: parenting

Tuesday, September 8, 2015

Ways for Parents to Handle Child Refusals

Dr. Beth Grosshans is a retired clinical child psychologist and author of Beyond Time Out: From Chaos to Calm. Her book provides parents with practical strategies for reigning in out-of-control behavior and creating harmonious family dynamics. One topic Dr. Beth Grosshans explores in her book is the occurrence of child refusals, which typically involve phrases such as, "You can’t make me!” and "You’re not the boss of me!”

This type of language means that the child has decided that the parent does not have authority and he or she will be the one calling the shots. In situations like these, where the child has crossed the line into rudeness and disrespect, it is important that the parent reassert control in a firm, calm, and non-angry way. The message should be short and direct and establish that it is not acceptable to speak to one’s parent in a disrespectful manner. For example, parents can respond to a child’s refusals simply by asserting, “You cannot refuse to cooperate.”

After setting parameters, the parent should escort the child to his or her room, with no further commentary, whatever protests emerge. This “tough love” approach teaches the child that there is no debate when it comes to basic matters of respect.

Thursday, July 16, 2015

Beyond Time-Out - Advice on How to Handle Misbehaving Children

A retired clinical child psychologist, Dr. Beth Grosshans has been featured in The Washington Post, Chicago Tribune, and The Washington Times over the course of her 25-year career. In 2010, Dr. Beth Grosshans leveraged her expertise in child behavior and development to publish the book Beyond Time-Out: From Chaos to Calm.

A 336-page book, Beyond Time-Out: From Chaos to Calm addresses undisciplined children and their out of control behaviors. The book encourages parents to evaluate their own actions to determine an appropriate solution for managing children and creating a balanced household, where a child does not have primary control. Specifically, readers are given advice on how to establish authority and power, which alleviates defiant battles with food, sleeping, and potty training. Likewise, the book offers guidance on calming fears and taming tantrums.

According to reader Ann Murphy, a parenting contributor to ABC’s Good Morning America, the publication delivers advice in an empathetic manner. The book sheds light on the difficulties of setting limits, while delivering a clear message about the rewards reaped when creating boundaries.

About Beth Grosshans

After establishing her Flemington, New Jersey-based private practice in 1994, licensed clinical psychologist Beth Grosshans, PhD, assisted children, adolescents, adults, couples, and families with psychological assessments and interventions for over 15 years. Concurrently she worked as a private consultant, providing clinical training and seminars on child development issues for faculty members at local schools. Also serving as an instructor for the Princeton Center for Teacher Education during this period, Dr. Beth Grosshans taught the course Child Development: Infant, Toddler, and through the Elementary Years at the Princeton Montessori School.

Since retiring from clinical practice, Dr. Beth Grosshans has concentrated on writing for and speaking to parents and educators about child development issues and discipline. She co-wrote the book Beyond Time-Out: From Chaos to Calm, in which she introduced the concept of imbalanced family power, contradicting prevailing child-centric notions of effective parenting and emphasizing the importance of exerting parental leadership and authority to prevent unruliness and anxiety in children.

Dr. Beth Grosshans received a BA in psychology from the University of Cincinnati and earned both an MA in psychology and a PhD in clinical child psychology from Ohio State University. Under Habib Davanloo, MD, she has also completed several intensive professional training courses in Intensive Short Term Dynamic Therapy. She is a retired member of the board of directors of the New Jersey Psychological Association Foundation and of the American Psychological Association.