While practicing as a clinical psychologist in New Jersey, Beth Grosshans, PhD, guided a practice that met the complex needs of families, including those dealing with out-of-control children. In her book Beyond Time-Out: From Chaos to Calm, Beth Grosshans, PhD, details corrective strategies that help parents halt the transfer of power to their children and develop effective leadership skills.
One type of parent Dr. Grosshans defines is the “pushover parent,” who takes personally their children’s protests, such as, "You're unfair!” or “You're so mean.” These and more subtle forms of resistance can result in parents ultimately giving up and telling themselves, “There’s nothing more that I can do," as they give in to their children’s demands.
Lacking an internalized power structure, parents scrabble for authority through stock phrases such as, "Santa won't give you any toys this year.” Alternatively, they may provide children with a long list of the bad things that may befall them if they don’t heed their directives, such as “Wash your hands, germs will make you sick.” Dr. Grosshans’ book provides concrete ways in which parents can use the language and behavior that is effective in rebalancing the parent-child relationship.
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